This is the Blank String podcast, staring Luke, Tim and Matt as they talk about things and stuff and junk and things.

Blank Start the first (and probably last) Lock-down Olympics

Whilst Luke, Matt and Tim have been locked up inside they have turned their attention to something which will no longer be the same, no not that, you dirty dog! The Olympics. So we have rectified this situation and created an Olympics which will rival that of the real Olympics. In my head, I can hear Matt say "This is the real Olympics", sure Matt, sure. Everything from quarantine javelin and shot put to the relay race and the COVID-19 chase. I am sure this will take off and if you want to join in, you can! It is free and amazing and we hope to see you at the opening ceremony with your matches at the ready.

Blank String predict the future of life no the outside

Luke, Matt and Tim are still stuck inside like the rest of you. So they take this opportunity to talk about what life will be like once we are all able to wander the streets free as a bird. We also forget to talk about this at the start and talk about Matt's new haircut for 10 minutes and Mrs Matt makes a cameo to force Matt to wear a hat, it does not end well. Hope you enjoy the hovercars in the outside world.

Blank String and their export quarantine advice

Luke,  Matt and Tim have been affected by this just like everyone else. They thought they would take this time to give everyone some advice on how to quarantine right!

Blank String get down on dirty

Luke, Matt and Tim managed to make it to the episode you have all been patiently waiting for. The one where we finally become some super filthy naughty boys. The 69th episode and we talk all things sex. It is great and well-informed information about all things sex. We don't mean to kink shame but maybe not we discover not everything is for everyone, not even robot alien on human action. Warning, this episode gets hot hot hot!

Blank String are deserted on a desert island part 3

The concluding conclusion of the hilarious 3 part series where Matt leads Luke and Tim on a pirate-themed adventure. Last time we finished the adventure Luke and Tim had taken over the ship and for whatever reason, with the help of an alien, sent Matts head back in time to be on the island in a fridge. Now Luke and Tim feel compelled to find out why there was a mutiny in the first place! Will they manage to wrap up the story in a satisfying way? Will Matt introduce several more keys which lead to nowhere and serve no purpose? Definitely. Enjoy this gripping conclusion.

Blank String are deserted on a desert island part 2

Last time on the Blank String podcast, Matt started some mad ramblings and Luke and Tim ended up surviving a desert island, this time they start where they left off on a ship with no plan or goal in mind other than to cause mayhem and chaos. Don't worry if you don't remember what happened last time, because we certainly don't remember and I am pretty sure a lot changed. If you love pirates, crane, aliens time travel or insane plot then don't miss the next part of another wacky adventure!

Blank String are deserted on a desert island part 1

Oh No! Luke and Tim have suddenly found themselves washed on a desert island, with no hope and no one to help them. Is this a dessert as in the geographical place or the meal? Will Tim burn things like he always does? Will Luke do something inappropriate? Do they both tear Matt a new one as he tries to weave a foreboding and intricate story with plot twists and turns? Listen to the crazy antics as Matt takes Luke and Tim on a tour of possible cabin fever (not the horror movie, more like the Muppets song).

Blank String protect everyone on their holidays

That's right, Tim is going on holiday (again) and we decided to help him relax and not have to worry about people who might want to ruin his time away. Anyone can do something simple like... carry a gun, but we at Blank String like to believe there is a better solution, possibly more violent solution. So what suggestions do Luke, Matt and Tim come up with to help protect him, Kirsty (the wife) and his possessions? Tune in and find out. Don't forget to share this podcast with your friends, we can be found on most podcast platforms, including Spotify.

Blank String design an expert secret service

Luke, Matt and Tim have just about enough of being heckled and abused on the streets. How do we solve this? Secret service of course! If famous people can hire people to jump in front of a bullet to save them then why can't we? Why stop there? How do we improve this? I still don't know but somehow we do and it costs nothing! Also, if you want to hear some personal accounting advice skip to around 34 mins to hear Matt and Tim talk about money, if you aren't interested just skip around 10 mins of that discussion ;)

Blank String Design a Rockin' Theme Park

Luke, Matt and Tim bring in the new year with a bang. They get together to design the greatest theme park anyone has ever seen. Failing that they make one which makes tons of money. Failing that they make one which has people coming back for more. Failing that they make a hilarious episode with typical Blank String antics.